Do You Agree that Bill is a F*cking Jackass?
The clever parable below explains the Federal government shut-down succinctly. Imagine how thrilled this liberal-Democrat was to find this allegory posted on the Facebook timeline of a friend who identifies as a Republican? After years of scaring people about big government, immigrants and lazy minority people abusing government programs, the Grand-Old-Party has been hijacked by a monster they themselves created.
BTW, The next person who tells me that the government shut-down is the fault of both parties is going to be told in no uncertain terms that such logic is tantamount to saying that those who refuse to pay the ransom demands of kidnappers and hostage takers are as morally reprehensible as the criminals.
Unless you too are a greedy, selfish, reactionary, bigoted, tea-party Republican, GET A SPINE AND HELP SAVE OUR COUNTRY FROM THESE MALCONTENTS WHO HAVE BEEN EXILED TO WASHINGTON SO PEOPLE CAN AGAIN EAT PEACEFULLY IN AMERICA’S RURAL DINERS WITHOUT HAVING TO LISTEN TO SOME MORON SOUNDING-OFF ON SUBJECTS THEY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT!
So, Imagine that the company you work for held a poll, and asked everyone if they thought it would be a good idea to put a soda machine in the break room. The poll came back, and the majority of your colleagues said “Yes”, indicating that they would like a soda machine. Some said no, but the majority said yes. So, a week later, there’s a soda machine.
Now imagine that Bill in accounting voted against the soda machine. He has a strong hatred for caffeinated soft drinks, thinks they are bad for you, whatever. He campaigns throughout the office to get the machine removed. Well, management decides “OK, we’ll ask again” and again, the majority of people say “Yes, lets keep the soda machine.”
Bill continues to campaign, and management continues to ask the employees, and every time, the answer is in favor of the soda machine. This happens, lets say… 35 times. Eventually, Bill says “OK, I’M NOT PROCESSING PAYROLL ANYMORE UNTIL THE SODA MACHINE IS REMOVED”, so nobody will get paid unless management removes the machine.
What should we do???
Answer: Fire Bill and get someone who will do the fucking job.
Bonus: Bill tells everyone that he was willing to “Negotiate”, to come to a solution where everyone got their payroll checks, but only so long as that negotiation capitulated to his demand to remove the soda machine.
Bill is a fucking jackass.